One Day at the Table...

A family is at the dinner table.

The son asks his father,  "Dad, how many kinds of boobies are there?"

The  father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there's three kinds of  breasts.  In her  twenties, a women's breasts are like melons, round and  firm.  In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.  After fifty, they are like onions."

"Onions?"

"Yes, you  see them and they make you cry."

This  infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mum, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?" 

The  mother, equally surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three  phases. In his twenties, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard.  In his  thirties and forties, it is a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties,  it is like a Christmas tree."

"A Christmas tree?"

"Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only."


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